what happened !!!!

It would be a personal post so i will write what i feel now really!!

what happened ?? I really asked my self what happened to me I feel I lost my spirit and feeling down 😦 I lost my  enthusiasm for the things that interests me for everything I just don’t care about anything ! oh my god I didn’t feel like that before !! I graduated 6 months ago and the the first 3 months i felt freedom and happy I just have fun , but this 2 months I don’t feel well 😦 I’m really depressed I missed studying , yes I have full free time and can do what I want but  feel boring , I see my sisters go to school at morning , I wake up early stay alone  I don’t go on my goals don’t know why this feeling chases me although I determine my goals before and decided to make a schedule to manage my time well but I couldn’t control it  .  as I know myself I’m positive girl and always thinking positively but now I could say that it’s one of my negative feeling ( I haven’t any explanation about that !! maybe due to I live away of my relatives also I don’t contact with my friends I don’t go out a lot I lost them  ;( ………….I’m really confused !! 

 

I  like drawing , learn languages many things I planning to do  but now I feel I don’t want to do any thing of this I don’t log in to social websites , can’t write I lost my weight too imagine …you know what I do?? I just thinking , thinking in what ?? in how I can back my spirit my enthusiasm , you may think I’m not normal at all  but that what happened ..

hmmm ..actually being Unemployment is not good at all or let me say being without doing anything not good anyway , I don’t know what will happen at the coming days whether got a job or complete my studying .but i’m not afraid of future  because it’s in the control of Allah ( god) or of being unemployed , because I will work in anything i will create my own business  I hope I could

now I don’t sit empty I just sit with my friend ( book)…I will try to pick up myself and go ahead , I will try to be positive 🙂

hmm I said what in my heart so never-mind  if you don’t find any benefit of my writing anyway

 

 

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تذكرة شوق الى وطن الحنين

كانت الايام الجميلة كفيلة بان تخلق ذكرى ,مكان  آوي اليه في وحدتي , هناك تتجدد ابتسامتي ,

أجد مقعد مؤنس لروحي , لكن لا أستطيع البقاء طويلا فقط المرور!

قيل ان الزمن يفرق الاجساد ليس القلوب !! , الارواح تبقى و يبقى أثرها

….اود ان اصدق ذلك ولكن اجد في الامر صعوبة

فقد اعتدت ان أراهم , أحكي لهم , أضحك معهم……

لم اتخيل ان أحدا سيشتت حديقة صداقتنا الجميلة

ولاكن هذه سنة الحياة شئنا ام ابينا لا يبقى شيء على حاله

فقد اقتطف الفراق جميع أنواع الورود واحدة تلو الاخرى فبقيت الوردة الوحيدة

اروي شوقي بذكراهم !!

فهم كانوا جسرا ل(ابتسامة ) , زاوية في قلبي باسم ( السعادة ) وجزء من حياتي بمعنى ( الصداقة)

أصواتهم موسيقى مهدئة لمشاعري الحزينة

تشجيعهم سلم قوي يجعلني اتمسك بالعزيمة ………..

قهوتي !! لم اعد اريد المزيد منها , اصبحت باردة , مرة

كانت اوقاتهم تحليها ,و دفء قلوبهم يدفئها…..

اعلنت الرحيل !!

على خطوط طيران الحب اخذت تذكرة شوق الى بلد الحنين………

اعلم ان ضني سيخيب فهناك لا احد …

فقط كتب ذكرى سطرها الماضي الجميل !!

longing ticket to a country of nostalgia

the beautiful days was ally to create a memory, a place to go to in my loneliness

there renewed my smile , find pleasent seat for my soul, but can’t stay long only passing!!

as said : the time divides bodies not hearts, souls stay and remains its effect

want beleive that but I find it difficult

I used to see them , talk to them , laugh with them

didn’t imagine anyone will disperse our beautiful friendship garden

but this is life , wheather we like it or not , nothing remains unchanged

so the farewell picked all kinds of roses one after the other

I stayed the only rose , irrigate longing by their remembrance

they were a bridge to ( smile ) , corner in my heart by the name of ( happiness ) , and a

part of my life in the sense of ( friendship)

Their voices soothing music to my sad feelings

their encouragement makes me hold strong determination
My coffee ! ! I no longer want more of it , became cool and bitter

the time with them was sweeten it , the warmth of their hearts warms it

now

Announced to leave ! !

on the Airlines of love I took longing ticket ,to a country of nostalgia ………

I know I will be disappointed because no one is there..

Only Remembrance book written through the beautiful time ! !

the journey of life too long alone

someone you depend on when you need help
never let you down always for you is support
by words , by thoughts and whatever you want
cheer you up, wipe your tears
always beside in good and hard times
when you feel sad or pleased
comfort your pain , close to your heart
notify you for your mistakes , just want of you doing the best
share with you events of life , ready to make your smile
no matter the distance even it’s miles
this is real friend ..deserve
love
caring
and all appreciation
but when this person vanish ,
the journey of life became too long walking alone